My toxic relationship na Matatu za Nakuru

This is a full on rant about the annoying things Matatus in Nakuru have put me through, so brace yourself.

First, we all agree that mats have always been the preferred choice of transport for many because of one main reason: affordability.

Who is ordering cabs daily to get to work in this economy?

You see, this dependability by those of us who are not trust fund babies is the reason we stay in this toxic relationship with the matatus.

One of the things that irritate me is how mats decide to fuel for the next day, while having passengers on board.

Take for instance this one evening where I had left work eager to get home like many other passengers on board. Ghafla bin vu we make a detour into a petrol station.

However, something that was supposed to take a few minutes ended up taking more than 15. This was not the first time this was happening.

Out of curiosity I asked one of the drivers why they keep doing this.

He said that they refuel while carrying the last round of passengers, as this helps not to refuel in the morning.

I understand ooh planning for the next day, but sasa we have to sit at a petrol station for over 15 minutes because someone would like to wake up with a full tank of fuel?  

Moving on, there is always the notion that a matatu is never full and that there is always room for one more person.

Often, the conductor will shout, “msongee hapo nyuma” while avoiding eye contact with the passengers huko nyuma, because even they know hakuna space huko nyuma.

An awkward moment then ensues as the new passenger is left bent over in the middle of the mat with nowhere to go. Enter the sambaza.

Now, apparently, there are those of you who steal the sambazas.

Someone on tiktok said, “wewe unaona sambaza, mimi naona chopping board”. Eih!

Now conductors are on high alert, guarding the sambazas with their lives.

The final annoying thing I’ll address today is how mats live by the adage, ‘kama uko na haraka nunua gari yako’.

Ni sawa, gari si yangu, but why would you make a stop at a stage that does not have any individual in sight, only to wait for over 10 minutes, making a journey that would primarily take 20 minutes take almost 40?

We know you are also working, but mnaoverdo guys!

I won’t even get into the issue of “nionyeshe message ya mpesa” as if the conductor doesn’t get a text on his end too.

Anyway, let me go work hard ninunue gari yangu.