How we handle pressure ya 'Utaoa lini' from our Pastor

It's very common to hear comments in the church of the youth chairperson being teased about when he or she is getting married, which is usually followed by cheers, and an awkward response of 'nitawaambia akikuja.'

But do the church leaders know the pressure that comes with that question knowing very well they are still children, right? I mean 30 years ata milk teeth imetoka kweli?

Florence Wangari ,26, says that the pressure sometimes has led some of the ladies to get married to the wrong person, because they just want to prove to the church that they walked down the aisle.

"Don't get me wrong, getting married is a good thing but some do it just to prove to the church and yet they don't know the person they are getting married to," she says. 

Wangari has faced the pressure too where she is constantly asked 'mchele ni lini?' which she has found a creative way to answer by saying 'itakua Saturday but siku ndio bado sijajua'.

She notes that whenever she is in a group of new people visiting youth service, and they happen to say they are single, she gets suggestive comments from her peers.

"When a new person visits and mentions that they are single, I am not surprised by people throwing phrases like ‘potential’ to indicate I can try my luck," she notes 

Joseph Njoroge, on his end, highlights that he's also had the pressure, but he doesn't succumb to it, noting he is in charge of his life.

"I am accountable for the decisions I make and I know there is time for everything and I should be careful with how I choose knowing very well before niende soko, soko imechafuka sana," he says. 

Njoroge notes that the pressure has led to many young people marrying fast which most of the time has led to divorce because they didn't get to know their partners well.

"Most young people face a lot of pressure and they decide the next time anapata mtu anaanguka na yeye, which shouldn't be the case," he adds. 

Njoroge however explains, that the pressure can also be helpful to keep one on their toes to help the young people avoid being beaten by time and realize they should have married early.

"Most churches nowadays are providing mentorship programs for youth to understand marriage and provide guidance on the same which is equally important," he says.

But for now, it is my wish that the youth remain guided by the words of the Holy Book in Isaiah 60:22, “When the time is right, I the Lord will make it happen.”